I got a questions the other day about my thoughts concerning coming out to his entire church body. Obviously every congregational group is little different so this post might not apply to your situation. But here was my reply...
It been awhile since my last post. I think its interesting how the more comfortable I get with the idea of being gay, the less I feel the need to discuss it with the world. That's a blog post of it's own I suppose.
I got a question a couple of weeks ago and I thought It was worth sharing on HelpImGay.com. I tend to get a lot of questions that deal with homosexuality and religion. Hmmm... Don't know why. Anyway, Ben asks (I'll paraphrase), "I'm considering dating my male friend from church. We are really good friends and we both feel that its against our religion but we both really want to. What do you think?"
I have been in your shoes. Here are a few things I thought before telling my wife:
People in my situation (gay man in mixed-orientation marriage) always ask me how it's possible for me to be so open about who I am. I suppose my situation is not any different than other gay people trying to decide if they should stay in the closet or announce to world their sexuality.
Wanna know if you are in the wrong relationship? Ask yourself this question. .. "If I was in a concentration camp and depended on the memory of ONE person to help me survive the day, who would I think of. If the answer isnt your partner... its time to move on.
Happiness at 80% should be the title of this post. People always ask us if we're going to stay married. It's been a long journey to discover the answer to that question. For now... the answer is, 'YES we are going to stay married.'
I will never forget the night my wife flipped on the lights at 12:30 at night, waking me from a dead sleep. It was the night that my wife would finally find out who I really was. I was dead asleep and had only been that way for a short while. She turn the light on and set and returned to bed. With a concerned look she asked, "Are we going to make this work or not?"...